Science Fiction's Reality

I live in a dual world.
One world is a world in which I co-exist with my children in peace and harmony. This world occurs at sporadic intervals during the day, week or month. I may not chance upon this world for an entire month, where as other days it will visit upon me for long stretches at a time (or in spurts: moment of joy !gack! moment of joy !gack!) . It is a euphoric world, one in which all is well with the beings that live upon its surface. My youngest will look at me with large blue lighted eyes and upon his face is Pure joy, unrefined delight, if it were a vegetable it would be the most raw and organic piece of produce directly outa the earth you could find in all of Oregon. His smile and laugh, ah sigh, that my friend is when I become a romantic all over again. I believe in felicity and the right to all humans to achieve their true contentment. My oldest, the other inhabitant in this world, I often connect to on an observation level only. He will be utterly absorbed in pretend when an over sized purple yoga block now takes on a deep guttural voice while the other yoga block asks questions of its partner. These new friends (?) are living a life with in this utopia, their problems and joys are unbeknownst to me yet my three year old knows them intimately. What makes this non-interaction an interaction is the hilarity of his little evolving Mind. You may think your kid is quirky and funny, but mine is quirky, spastic and odd (much like his mom). This promotes a rejuvenating sense of laughter which can often be quite healing. I may not laugh out loud, but the lightness in my heat, ah yes again this is where I am still a romantic.
I suppose my alternate world is more that, alternate. Not opposite, just different in its direction and patterns verses a compare and contrast. In this opposing world my emotions are run into the ground and I often feel at a loss, a loss of words and a loss in battle. I wake up to a, "I want chocolate milk" and rather than like a humbling subject lowering to the ground in respect, it is a violent upheaval of all bodily parts at the foot of my bed as a resounding, "NO" is shouted. And a good morning to you, I think to myself. The two (all most three) year old mind cannot comprehend love or P-a-t-i-e-n-c-e, and I am not supposed to expect him to yet (damn it). Nor can I expect of my crawling teething monster to stop chewing on electrical cords, to stop crawling under the computer desk and banging his head on all hard wooden objects, to look at me and say, "Momma, I'm tired" rather than screaming his piercing ear drum breaking cry. This alternate world is very science fiction; often I breathe fire out of my nostrils and mouth, I am often crazed eyed speaking in a baby language or I purely do not make any sense to my husband and am a basket full of raging emotions. Community, love, peace and contentment are void on this planet, chaos rains in the rainy city of Portland.
The best encouragement I receive when forced to interact and function in this dysfunctional world? You're doing great, the best you can, it's just a phase, it won't be like this forever.
Who said I was doing the best I could?
And who said it wouldn't be like this forever?
Did God? Cause if He did I'll rest assured that it will all work out according to His "plan" other wise I think I'll go get a drink.